After seeing another 3 friends getting burned last month alone, I've decided to speak up a little bit. I got burned myself for the 6th time many moons ago so I believe I have the credibility to expose some of the dude's code in a relationship. Below is the boyfriend's side of story in case of a break up.
#1. It's okay I'm alright
When couples break up, many assume the girl would take the most emotional damage and the boy would be okay as he is a tough man. FALSE.
The Bad News: For the dudes who were serious about the relationship and had worked hard for their future, a break up from the girlfriend's side is devastating. Many girls would simply cut their hair or post emotional songs or posts online. For dudes, emotionally they'll be scarred but they just won't cry about it. All the emotion manifest itself into drastic physical changes. Hairstyle change, purchase of random items, body mass fluctuation, change of habits. Or worse turning homo. The most obvious thing for one to spot is the absence of smile. No dude smiles after such emotional holocaust, and they'll only smile when near other close mates or if being forced to. A shadow of doubt have been cast onto him when he's near his ex or other non-friend females.
The Good News: This phase only last a few days to a few months with or without support. (depending on your playboyility) Gradually he will move on from checking out other girls, to stalking Facebook profiles, to going out to clubs etc. until he eventually meet a new one.
#2. FML
An elaboration for #1, whereby the dude goes through the after break-up phase. This is the critical phase where the dude is the most vulnerable and susceptible to anything. Usually applies in situations where the girl initiates the break-up, detrimental relationship from both parties, or a mistake from the dude that leads to the break up.
The Bad News: Although short-lived, this phase of after break-ups is the worst for any dudes in his life. He tends to phuck up everything he was doing and thinks he's a failure, loser, an ass, don't give a damn, you name it. It is an indescribable feeling that only those who had experienced it will understand. The best I can describe is the man had his very existence broken down to his foundation of what he had worked and believed all these years. Full support from family and friends are required as the dude may attempt to do stupid things. During this phase too friends should advise the dude to stay off any girls as they will only be his rebound girl.
The Good News: Just like #1 this phase is short lived.
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#3. That's not my ex, that's my mistake
In worse case scenario when it is the female's side who triggered the break up, the sentence "let's just be friends" is meaningless to the boyfriend.
The Bad News: Any decent dudes with pride and face would never accept such insult to injury. The feeling of being toyed, used or fooled into false hope will turn trigger his soul to see the thing he loved into something he despised the most. Then the term "friends" will further give false hope to the dude to get back to her. Many will go into shock and try to get the relationship going. After a while the dude will realize he deserves a better life than begging forever. His brain would simply shut out any memories that will sadden the heart to allow the dude to move on with life. In certain cases the ex-girlfriend is non-existent.
The Good News: Time will heal. After months or years of needed desolation from the ex, the dude's brains usually almost deleted all the memories by then, allowing him to say "I was an ass, let's be friends again". By then both parties should have a new partner and all's good.
==================================================================
#4 Rebound Girl
The new void created from the absence of a loved one needs to be filled, fast, no matter what the cost.
The Bad News: Shortly after a break up a dude needs all the console he can get. Sometimes his female friends will give the best consoles as the dudes just suck at comforting another dude. This is when the dude will slowly grow attached to the girl and his heart says he needs her. She has become his rebound girl. This is dangerous as there is a high chance that the rebound girl will find out she was just substituting his ex-girlfriend's spot, which is creepy. The ensuing breakup will only devastate the dude more and he'll simply lose the will to live. GG.
The Good News: Many relationships involving rebound boy/girlfriends do work. Although the max I've seen was only 5 years. But I do believe somewhere out there a rebound relationship did work till marriage though you are betting on maybe, 10% success.
==================================================================
#5 Burn Baby Burn
I'll never fall in love again...
The Bad News: Some dudes may have gotten their first burn, others their 10th, 50th, 100th burn. Anyways, after a certain n number of burns the dude will simply say enough is enough. He'll never seek love anymore and indulge himself with whatever he has left. Like what Taio said "I wanna celebrate and live my life"... so you can kiss your love life goodbye. Friends and families, support his celibacy to encourage him to live on and be successful in life.
The Good News: Whenever a dude says it, somehow he'll end up with a new partner eventually. It's like a touch wood thing, except those sentences attract good things.
==================================================================
#6 If I Can't Have You No One Can!
This is the scariest, most evil intent a boyfriend's heart can create.
The Bad News: After the break up, if the boyfriend is not begging or done doing so he will resort to the next stage; revenge. This is when he will come up with many things to destroy his ex-girlfriend's life literally, metaphorically or both. Spreading bad rumors about the ex, blocking her access to you or your friends, etc are the few things a man is capable of doing. He will continue to do so until he sees her destruction with his own eyes.
The Good News: Usually happens to those new to relationships. The veterans will be matured enough to not do such things. Plus after seeing how he had destroyed his ex-girlfriend's life, he will have this guilty feeling and feel sorry for her.
Anywho give the dude some time to mourn, recover and then get back on his feet after a break up. Bros over hos code should be observed by close brothers of the dude to encourage him to get back into the game. Or not. People get burned sometimes and it is these burns that will shape and show you the exact partner that suits you. And hey, it's not so bad being single. Welcome back to the sea my friend. Once you sober up I hope you'll be swimming in it again. Cheer cheers~
#1. It's okay I'm alright
When couples break up, many assume the girl would take the most emotional damage and the boy would be okay as he is a tough man. FALSE.
The Bad News: For the dudes who were serious about the relationship and had worked hard for their future, a break up from the girlfriend's side is devastating. Many girls would simply cut their hair or post emotional songs or posts online. For dudes, emotionally they'll be scarred but they just won't cry about it. All the emotion manifest itself into drastic physical changes. Hairstyle change, purchase of random items, body mass fluctuation, change of habits. Or worse turning homo. The most obvious thing for one to spot is the absence of smile. No dude smiles after such emotional holocaust, and they'll only smile when near other close mates or if being forced to. A shadow of doubt have been cast onto him when he's near his ex or other non-friend females.
The Good News: This phase only last a few days to a few months with or without support. (depending on your playboyility) Gradually he will move on from checking out other girls, to stalking Facebook profiles, to going out to clubs etc. until he eventually meet a new one.
==================================================================
#2. FML
An elaboration for #1, whereby the dude goes through the after break-up phase. This is the critical phase where the dude is the most vulnerable and susceptible to anything. Usually applies in situations where the girl initiates the break-up, detrimental relationship from both parties, or a mistake from the dude that leads to the break up.
The Bad News: Although short-lived, this phase of after break-ups is the worst for any dudes in his life. He tends to phuck up everything he was doing and thinks he's a failure, loser, an ass, don't give a damn, you name it. It is an indescribable feeling that only those who had experienced it will understand. The best I can describe is the man had his very existence broken down to his foundation of what he had worked and believed all these years. Full support from family and friends are required as the dude may attempt to do stupid things. During this phase too friends should advise the dude to stay off any girls as they will only be his rebound girl.
The Good News: Just like #1 this phase is short lived.
==================================================================
#3. That's not my ex, that's my mistake
In worse case scenario when it is the female's side who triggered the break up, the sentence "let's just be friends" is meaningless to the boyfriend.
The Bad News: Any decent dudes with pride and face would never accept such insult to injury. The feeling of being toyed, used or fooled into false hope will turn trigger his soul to see the thing he loved into something he despised the most. Then the term "friends" will further give false hope to the dude to get back to her. Many will go into shock and try to get the relationship going. After a while the dude will realize he deserves a better life than begging forever. His brain would simply shut out any memories that will sadden the heart to allow the dude to move on with life. In certain cases the ex-girlfriend is non-existent.
The Good News: Time will heal. After months or years of needed desolation from the ex, the dude's brains usually almost deleted all the memories by then, allowing him to say "I was an ass, let's be friends again". By then both parties should have a new partner and all's good.
==================================================================
#4 Rebound Girl
The new void created from the absence of a loved one needs to be filled, fast, no matter what the cost.
The Bad News: Shortly after a break up a dude needs all the console he can get. Sometimes his female friends will give the best consoles as the dudes just suck at comforting another dude. This is when the dude will slowly grow attached to the girl and his heart says he needs her. She has become his rebound girl. This is dangerous as there is a high chance that the rebound girl will find out she was just substituting his ex-girlfriend's spot, which is creepy. The ensuing breakup will only devastate the dude more and he'll simply lose the will to live. GG.
The Good News: Many relationships involving rebound boy/girlfriends do work. Although the max I've seen was only 5 years. But I do believe somewhere out there a rebound relationship did work till marriage though you are betting on maybe, 10% success.
==================================================================
#5 Burn Baby Burn
I'll never fall in love again...
The Bad News: Some dudes may have gotten their first burn, others their 10th, 50th, 100th burn. Anyways, after a certain n number of burns the dude will simply say enough is enough. He'll never seek love anymore and indulge himself with whatever he has left. Like what Taio said "I wanna celebrate and live my life"... so you can kiss your love life goodbye. Friends and families, support his celibacy to encourage him to live on and be successful in life.
The Good News: Whenever a dude says it, somehow he'll end up with a new partner eventually. It's like a touch wood thing, except those sentences attract good things.
==================================================================
#6 If I Can't Have You No One Can!
This is the scariest, most evil intent a boyfriend's heart can create.
The Bad News: After the break up, if the boyfriend is not begging or done doing so he will resort to the next stage; revenge. This is when he will come up with many things to destroy his ex-girlfriend's life literally, metaphorically or both. Spreading bad rumors about the ex, blocking her access to you or your friends, etc are the few things a man is capable of doing. He will continue to do so until he sees her destruction with his own eyes.
The Good News: Usually happens to those new to relationships. The veterans will be matured enough to not do such things. Plus after seeing how he had destroyed his ex-girlfriend's life, he will have this guilty feeling and feel sorry for her.
Anywho give the dude some time to mourn, recover and then get back on his feet after a break up. Bros over hos code should be observed by close brothers of the dude to encourage him to get back into the game. Or not. People get burned sometimes and it is these burns that will shape and show you the exact partner that suits you. And hey, it's not so bad being single. Welcome back to the sea my friend. Once you sober up I hope you'll be swimming in it again. Cheer cheers~
1 comment:
Damn i got eye strain reading this myself. Sorry peeps, reducing your screen's brightness helps
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